Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Squishy faces

Genevieve makes the cutest little scrunchy face when she’s happy. She wrinkles up her nose, opens her mouth in a half moon smile and chuckles. I squish up my face when I’m happy, too.

I am so much happier nowadays than when I was taking off my clothes for a living. My life and my choices have steadily improved throughout time. I’ve managed to extricate myself out of unwise career decisions, unhealthy romantic relationships and dangerous lifestyle habits. I’m sure we all have escaped specters of death, but when I think of all the events in my life that could have turned out differently, I feel grateful for having survived.

I am a survivor. Depression, regret and guilt may tug me down to the ground sometimes, but I know now that I will always be able to pull myself up again. I will learn from Genevieve as she becomes skilled at physically hoisting her trembling body onto her standing feet.

Genny and I both know that she will be able to get herself up soon. Even though right now she needs lots of assistance to stand, there will be no stopping her. She will stand on her own.

And I will continue to move forward in life, just as I always have; only now I am not alone. I have Nick’s hand and Genny’s hand wrapped in mine.

There are many squishy faces to come in life.

1 comment:

  1. Anonymous4:13 PM

    "My life and my choices have steadily improved throughout time"