I took a long break from posting
my dancing videos. I needed to take a break because I didn’t know why I was
doing it anymore.
My original impetus was: A former
stripper, now a mom of three, I've decided to really strip down and dance and
express myself, but with my clothes on. After struggling with depression my
whole life and having been on antidepressants for about 15 years, I've decided
to try life medication free. I realize I need something else to sustain me
though. I need meaning. I need to push myself into joy every day.
And I think the dancing and
putting it out there into the public as a way of sharing my journey helped, and
after I stopped, the depression, of course, did creep back in.
And I’ve gone back on and off
medication when the depression became so bad that I knew I needed that kind of
help. I recognized it. So now, I find myself back in that place. Back on
antidepressants as a way to stay functioning.
Yoga helps me, too.
But I’ve been having an urge to
get off the mat and shake it. And I just want to follow my heart again. And see
if it might help, even a little.
