Is Rape Ever Not Rape?

Chrissie Hynde of the Pretenders ruffled feathers talking about her autobiography on BBC’s Woman’s Hour with Jenni Murray.

Murray spoke of the controversy caused by Hynde talking about her “rape,” which Hynde denied naming the experience. Hynde feels responsible for the event because she put herself into the situation.

Of course, this goes against everything we as women tend to say about rape—it is never a woman’s fault.

Hynde was trying to point out there’s a difference between getting dragged into the bushes in a park and being high, reckless and in a dangerous situation.

I totally get what she’s saying. It’s kind of like what I think I’ll teach my daughter—you’re never at fault for rape, but please do protect yourself as much as possible. Don’t put yourself in situations that compromise you.

I wish that were not the case, but I do think we need to deal with the real world.

I want my daughter to know the risks out there and how to protect herself.

Girls Like Dinosaurs, Too

Bravo to the mompreneurs highlighted in CNN’s #ClothesWithoutLimits: Fed-up moms create their own clothing for girls.

These moms, whose daughters were not into the typical Justice pink, purple and sparkle clothing, created their own clothing lines that include shirts for girls with what most would describe as “typical boy” imagery: dinosaurs, soccer balls, tools.

Because not all girls want to be princesses—or look like them.

How fabulous that in the future girls might be able to go to their local shop and find clothing that suits everybody.

Speaking of suits, one of the moms is even trying to create a line of suits for girls, Suit Her.

While it may be awhile before we start seeing clothing lines like Princess Free Zone or Girls Will Be in our local stores, thanks to the Internet, girls are being given more options in how they can see themselves and present themselves to the world.

Boy/Girl. Blue/Pink. Yawn! Let's Get Real!

My kids are constantly surprising me in opposing directions.

When I suggested to my son that he play with dolls with his sister, he was quick to point out “Dolls are for girls!”

He certainly didn’t get that from me. (And yo, those superhero action figures are dolls!)

Then the other day, he reached for a pink version of something (I honestly don’t remember what it was; I’m lucky I remember their names), and my daughter shouted, “You can’t pick that one! It’s pink!”

And he stepped up to the plate and announced, “I can like pink!”

And I was like, “Yeah!”

Now we’re talking! I’ve always told my three children that just because society labels everything boy—blue and everything girl—pink, doesn’t mean that has to be the way we see it.

The big box store Target agrees. They are going to move forward with phasing out gender-based signage in both the toys and bedding section.

The majority of people are happy, proclaiming this a step forward in the fight to remove gender-specified items from our consciousness.

Some people argue that Target is just giving into the latest politically correct fad.

Come on! We all know it’s silly to label certain toys “girl” or “boy.”

Why would we want to box kids into being what the world expects?

I want my kids breaking molds and being whomever they wish to be—whether it be in pink or blue (or purple or green, etc. you get the point…)!

When Stripping Feels Like Your Only Option

“Kim” wrote an opinion piece for The Guardian, I work at the US Senate. I shouldn't have to dance at strip clubs to feed my son.

This is a powerful story that highlights how and why some women who wouldn’t normally strip find themselves in situations where stripping becomes the best option they see available.

Kim details her very rough childhood and her amazing struggle to stand on her own two feet as a young woman. Being a single mother, she cannot afford to pay her bills every month unless she strips.

I’m a single mother and I struggle to support my son on the $10.33 an hour I make at one of the most exclusive clubs in America – the US Senate. I’m a cashier employed by the British-owned contractor that runs the cafeterias in the Senate office buildings. But even though I serve some of the wealthiest and most powerful people in the world, I can’t afford to buy my son school supplies or clothes…

When I realized that I couldn’t survive on what I was making at the Senate, I made a difficult decision. Faced with eviction notices and unpaid bills, I decided to dance at a strip club a few nights a week to earn extra money. It was the only job I could find that let me work a flexible schedule and earn a living wage.

I was not in such a desperate situation when I began stripping at 18, but in my naïve mind at the time, I felt a sense of there being no other avenues for me to turn to.

Obviously, that wasn’t true for me, but I believed it and so it became my reality for awhile..

Kim sounds as though stripping really is one of her only viable options to make the money she needs, working the hours she needs.

I don’t want to be a stripper: it can be demeaning to dance for men who show no respect for women. I only do it out of necessity, because I have to support my son…when [the senators] sit down with the primary voters and listen to their problems, I hope they’ll be thinking about my story too – and the tough decisions the workers who serve them every day have to make for the people they love.

I wish I had an answer for Kim and other women like her who feel stripping is their only saving grace.

Right now, all I have to offer are words of encouragement and support that it does get better and will get better.

You are doing what you need to for yourself and your family. Hold your head high and know that you are valuable and valued.

Thank you for sharing your story, Kim.

Photography Projects Embrace Diverse Bodies and Truths

Bodies have always been seen as artful and beautiful. They have also been seen as canvasses for the stories we have to tell. And now, with such amazing technology available to many, we are seeing and hearing stories that we didn’t hear before.

For example, I am loving the abundance of photographers taking photographs of mothers pre and post baby.

There will never be too many.

Let these photos of moms celebrating their bodies become as commonplace as models in bikinis on magazine covers in supermarkets.

The latest project I learned about is Divine Mothering by photographer Liliana Taboas Cruz.

Cruz’s photos of mothers on her blog also include interviews with her models, which allow the viewer to put a personality and story to the images.

Two other photographers, Paula Akpan and Harriet Evans, use models of differing body types, genders and race to express the different ideas and stereotypes that people are tired of hearing in the "I'm Tired" project.

The mission of this project is “to highlight the significance and lasting impact of everyday micro-aggressions and stereotypes.”

Art is all around us now. Images and stories flood our virtual lives.

Artists are taking advantage of the possibilities to address social issues and reach audiences all over the world.

Each project spawns the artist in others. Each celebration of diversity allows the next generation to feel more vocal and capable of telling their own truths and stories.

We are moms and these are our bodies

Mum Photographs Women's Bodies Pre- And Post-Birth To Paint An 'Honest Picture Of Motherhood' on The Huffington Post UK by Amy Packham introduces readers to photographer Natalie McCain.

She captures mothers in all their body glory in The Honest Body Project. These women radiate out true beauty and power.

"I want to help other mums come to this realisation and change their inner voice to self love. When you change your inner voice, your entire world changes."

How wonderful to be able to help other women celebrate and appreciate their bodies just as they are.

Ten Clues You’re a Mom and Not a Stripper Anymore

1)      The only time you whip out your breasts in public is to nurse your hungry baby.

2)      The best compliment you’ve received lately is when your husband saw you in jeans a few weeks postpartum and said, “You look good. Not thin, not fat, just normal” and it made you feel awesome.

3)      The comment “How beautiful!” lobbed in your direction no longer makes you think you might be able to sell a lap dance, but rather that you need to lock your daughter in her bedroom until she turns eighteen.

4)      The only hands you need to worry about tugging on your clothes and pulling your underpants down belong to fingers sticky with candy.

5)      You are now actually responsible for cleaning up all incidents of vomit, urine and feces that happen in your vicinity.

6)      Underwear is no longer about how much you can show, but how much you can hold in.

7)      The last time you had a Brazilian, it was a bag of take-out and didn’t involve hot wax, tears or walking funny the next day.

8)      The only bouncer in your employ is not a massive bodybuilder named Vinny, but a springy seat with baby elephants and kangaroos on it.

9)      The only bottle service you’re negotiating is whether you or your husband will be taking the 3 am feeding with baby.

10)  Instead of guys hassling you to negotiate for bjs, it’s all about fending off repeated requests for PB&Js.

Embrace Your Inner Madonna

Perhaps it’s because I was a teenager when Madonna was first hitting it big in the 1908s, but I still hold a spot in my heart for her ability to stay relevant in our fast-moving, youth-loving culture.

And perhaps it has something to do with being a bit of a rebellion myself when I was younger by embracing my sexuality and expressing it as a stripper and nude model, but I can’t get on the bandwagon and bash Madonna’s performance at the Grammy’s.

The Daily Mail called it:

Hordes of toyboys, buttock flashing and semi-naked pictureson social media... So when WILL (56-year-old) Madonna grow up?

and

Madonna, 56, takes to the Grammys stage for yet another cringe worthy performance as she simulates sex with her male dancers

The message repeated ad nauseum seems to be that it’s OK for young artists to show cleavage and butt, but when it comes to anyone over the age of thirty—whoa! Better reign it in, old lady!

But even worse than her age is that she’s a mother!

Dear God! No! A mom who wants to continue a life of her own? A mom who believes she still gets to be who she is no matter how old she is or how many kids she has?

I’m not saying every mom should run out there and flash her body to the world, but if it’s what Madonna wants to do, then her age or parental status should have nothing to do with it.

Madonna is doing all of us mothers a favor by showing we can still embrace our Rebel Hearts.

Age is just a number.

Parental status is just one aspect of what makes up a person.

Celebrate who you are and what you want to do in life and how you want to express it.

Embrace your inner Madonna.

Express your Rebel Heart.

The Struggling Mom Wants to Break the Cycle

I was just looking through the comics I had tried doing awhile ago.

Well, awhile ago turns out to be 2008! Really, Sheila? Seven years ago I was writing about the same things I'm dealing with today, except add one more kid into the mix?

This is perhaps why I don't like to make New Year's resolutions. They seem to serve to make me regret what I don't accomplish as opposed to being happy for any little triumphs.

I wanted to keep working on my comics and try to further my drawing, but I didn't.

And it seems I'm still the "struggling mom."

Always trying, but never achieving.

Always being too hard on myself.

Maybe I should make a resolution...to not be so hard on myself. To accept what is.

But if I'm not able to actually do that, will I just see it as another failure on my part?

Seems like an endless circle set up to make sure I stay stuck.

Perhaps I am a walking, talking example of a fulfilling prophecy.

Perhaps my resolution instead should be to figure out how to break the cycle.

To the Mom Struggling to Survive:

It’s ok to feel depressed.

It’s ok to say things to your kids you wish you could take back.

You can take them back. You can ask for forgiveness.

Sometimes all you can see are the shadows

You can explain to your children that sometimes even moms struggle.

It’s ok to be glad when you drop your kids off at school and to be frustrated when it’s already time to meet the bus.

It’s ok to want time to yourself, to want to have no responsibilities and to want your pre-mommy body back.

It’s understandable to feel like life for everyone would be better if you didn’t exist.

And it is ok to feel guilty afterwards for thinking that. Or to not feel guilty—to feel confused.

It’s ok if you don’t want to bake cookies or sew your own Halloween costumes. It’s ok to spend $20 on costumes at Walmart.

It’s ok if you sometimes feel like you can’t go on, that you made a mistake, that you weren’t made for this mothering thing.

And it’s ok to feel depressed about your life even if to others your life looks perfect, even then.

Maybe more so then.

You do not have to beat yourself up about feeling depressed; that will only make you feel worse.

Sometimes you will feel differently. I promise you. Even if it’s not today or tomorrow. One day, you will feel happy again.

You will smell their sweetness again. You will savor their hugs. You will feel their love’s penetrating power.

So hold on until then.

Do your best to maintain, to push on, to know that it gets better.

Because it does. It will.

You are never alone, even if it feels that way.

Even when it feels like no one understands you or what you are experiencing and you just don’t know what to do. Close your eyes, take a breath and know that somewhere, someplace, there is love.

And let that be enough.

*Inspired by Wendy Wisner's: "To the Mom of a Nursing Toddler"

Through the Fires: Writing, Life and Motherhood

By Alicia Ogg

I started reading and writing when I was 4-years-old. I used to make little books, mostly about my cat (c-a-t being the first word I ever wrote). I still have some of these books, which my mother would cut and staple together for me to read to her. My creativity was always encouraged and realized; as I got older, it was something I took for granted. I've written in a journal since the age of six, using it as my safe place to organize my thoughts—a form of catharsis and therapy.

Photo of Alicia Ogg - Mom Writer

In 1995 when I was 14, my home burned down while all of us were sleeping. I'm the oldest of four and everyone was able to get out safely, but I couldn't stop blaming myself for putting the clothes in the dryer before I went to bed, the cause of my family's loss of all of our possessions and home.

I lost almost all of my writing in the fire. My mom did find a box that had some of my art and some of the little books I'd written that had been stuffed under the bed and between other things, so it was protected, so I still have a peek at what I was like. After the fire, I separated my life into two sections—it was always “before” and “after” the fire. I feel like I lost a huge part of myself, and while I've been able to gain some of it back, I've lost so many memories from not having my early journals available. It still makes me sad, especially when I hear of others who go through situations of loss. Writing helped me get through it and have an avenue to express myself.

Writing notebooks of poems was my way to purge my teen angst. I was then diagnosed with clinical depression as a sophomore in high school. I felt that I was unlovable and even if I ever found someone to marry me (did I even want to be married?), I would never bring children into this horrible world to suffer so much pain. I was hospitalized for two weeks because I couldn't think about anything except death, although the actual act of dying terrified (and still terrifies) me. All I remember while being there was writing and drawing pictures to pass the time.

I'm ready to revisit my past through writing and am in a much more objective space now that I'm older. Writing for me has been a private act for the most part, although I've never had trouble telling others about my experiences. My hope is that letting others read about my circumstances will help them in some way, moms particularly.

When writing or painting, my biggest concern is that I won't be able to translate my thoughts and feelings as explicitly as I want to, to get my meaning across the way I want. College was spent learning that no matter what you do, you can't control what someone else will get out of your art. My concerns and excitement about putting my writing out there are sort of one in the same and for me depends on the reader's reaction or response.

I recently tuned into NPR when they were talking about memory and new findings about how they've actually formulated a drug that can erase things that you don't want to remember (at least in mice for now.) The more often you revisit a certain memory, the less real it becomes. Each time you're actually just revisiting the memory of the memory of the memory. While listening, I felt glad that I had written down my past while the event and feelings were occurring because I always have a fresh, original memory to go back to. Sure, the meaning changes depending on age and circumstances, like reading 'Catcher in the Rye' when you're out of college vs. 12 years old, even though the words are the same.

Since having children, two boys, one just turned five and the other will be two at the end of January, time has flown by. When I had my second, I couldn't believe that my older boy had ever been that little. You think you're going to remember every single moment, but in two years I'd forgotten some of the things I went through during pregnancy.

Photo of Alicia Ogg and her children

You can call it 'mommy-brain' or 'pregnancy brain,' but the reality is, you can't remember every minute of every day of your or your children's lives. If it's true that you're just remembering a memory of a memory, I think it’s important to write down experiences when they’re fresh in your mind.

I'd always send my friend (what he found to be hilarious) emails about all the weird things I was going through during pregnancy, or the funny things my boys do and say, so I go back and read those, too. It doesn't have to be a lot, just little tidbits can jog your brain into going back to that day when he said his first word or she started to unzip her own coat, or that weird thing your baby's been doing in your belly that makes your kidneys feel like they're in your throat. I'm so glad I've documented my life and my kid's lives through writing so I have those memories preserved.

My butt: The beauty of the before and after

Goodness, there has been an awful lot of stripping down going on lately by mothers. From the Dutch model Lara Stone, who posed nude post-baby for System Magazine, to Kim Kardashian’s greased up Paper cover, there is definitely no longer a need to pay for a Playboy subscription.

The Daily Mail UK says Kardashian explains, “As a role model I'm not saying anyone else should do that, but for me it was an art project and it taught me to do what you want to do.”

You can’t argue that point; it is good to feel empowered enough to act on your own desires and to not be shamed by others’ morals.

I used to do just that.

Before: Back in my modeling days

Then I got older and--wiser? I hid my body away. I covered up. I got more conservative as befits a mother, or so I thought.

And I lost some of my sense of self. I lost some sense of myself as a beautiful, sexual woman. I lost connection to a certain part of myself.

I've watched with interest as celebrities and everyday women claim empowerment through posing nude; it's made me ponder my stance and realize where I stand.

This past week, I've seen the expected parodies and responses to Kim Kardashian's butt: Chelsea Handler has been doing her own selfie-versions as part of the conversation and there’s even a Princess Jasmine version of the butt shot.

This whole posing-in-the-nude-to-make-some-point just might be getting oversaturated.

Of course, maybe that could be part of some kind of solution to how women are portrayed in media. If we see everybody and their mother (literally) in the nude, maybe we’ll get to the point as a culture where we’ll say, who cares?

Maybe we’ll get to the point where nobody will say, “Oh! But you’re a mother! You shouldn’t pose nude!”

After: 23 years and three children later

Maybe we’ll get to the point where we really will get to see the diversity and beauty in all different shapes and sizes and ages of bodies.

Maybe we’ll get to the point where every nude image of a woman doesn’t have to be sexualized and presented for a male gaze, but can just be a photo of a female celebrating her body.

Maybe we’ll get to the point where what we choose to do or not do with our bodies will be our decisions to make alone and no one will judge us for those decisions.

And hey, maybe the fathers will get in on the act, too. And we can all live in a happy-ever-after world with lots of different naked people all getting along and loving each other regardless of how perfect (or not) our bodies are.

Baring All For Our Children

Please visit Alicia Kamm's new website, Born Ready Baby. She interviewed me for a piece, Mom Bares All: Now & Then.

Baring all, stripping down, seems like such an important task for women today. Especially as mothers. I want my daughter to not enter the world without knowledge or to be stunned when she loses her innocence.

It's a wobbly line I walk as I figure out how and when to talk to my daughter about my past. But I know it's so important to be honest and to present her with a good role model.

Celebrity Baby Scoop reports on actress Melissa McCarthy about how she deals with talking to her own young daughters about her issues in Melissa McCarthy: I Don’t Want To Pass On Negative Body Image To Daughters.

Mom-of-two Melissa McCarthy opens up about her weight in the latest issue of Good Housekeeping. ”Sometimes I wish I were just magically a size six and I never had to give [my weight] a single thought,” the Bridesmaids star admits. 

“But I am weirdly healthy, so I don’t beat myself up about it – it wouldn’t help, and I don’t want to pass that on to my girls,” she adds.

As moms we are so hyper-vigilant about not passing on our issues to our daughters, which I think is good.

If we're aware enough to understand what will probably affect our children, hopefully we're conscious enough to also be working on our issues for ourselves, too.

Are there any issues or bad habits that you worry about passing on to your children?

When and Where is Breastfeeding OK in the Public's Opinion?

I wrote about Professor Adrienne Pine's breastfeeding in class for the Huffington Post: Breastfeeding Professor's Non-Incident Makes Headlines: When Will Moms Be Allowed to do it all in Order to Have it All?

Yahoo's headline made me think this professor was using the classroom as political statement: "Feminist Anthropology Professor Blasted for Breastfeeding During Class," but nothing could be farther from the truth.

Professor Adrienne Pine had a dilemma on the first day of her Sex, Gender and Culture class at American University in Washington, D.C when her baby had a fever and couldn't go to daycare. She didn't want her students to miss the introductory class, so she brought along her child to it. Her child did fine for awhile, but when she got cranky, she breastfed for a few minutes until the baby fell asleep.

Professor Pine never meant to make a statement. She was just trying to teach her class. Unfortunately, some students went to the college's newspaper, where they were all too eager to make it a story. Despite Pine's attempts to explain the situation and show what a non-issue this was, it has turned into headline news...

Read the rest at The Huffington Post...

Summer Romance Novel Writing and Exercising with the Kids

Photo of Sheila Hageman taken by her daughter

I’ve been enjoying the summer by working on my next writing project, which is a romance novel. Five days a week I spend an hour-and-a-half working on the manuscript or write a minimum of 1,000 words. This process has been working well for me—I have an option of two different goals I can meet for the day.

I’ve not been doing as much exercise and yoga as I would like and I have been noticing the difference in my body and energy levels. I weigh the most I have ever weighed (except for when I was pregnant).

Body image issues have been floating around in my head as I try to figure out who I am on the outside and what relation it has to the inner me. I’m definitely loving my fuller-figured body, but I’m not loving that my clothes don’t fit.

In honor of wanting to set a good example for my kids I’ve decided to start on a new exercise regimen. My kids joined me last night after dinner by heading down to the bike path not too far from our home and doing some running.

Kids watching birds while Mommy stretched

I was pretty impressed with everyone’s enthusiasm and energy. Exercising with the kids definitely made it more doable and fun. And now everybody is looking forward to the next fun spot I’ll choose for us tonight!

Should People Judge Octomom for Her Career Choices?

I commented yesterday on Celebrity Momster on the story that Nadya Suleman, Octomom, was becoming a stripper for a brief stint at a Florida strip joint.

Today, Celebs on Gather reports—Octomom Nadya Suleman Cancels Strip Club Gig; Why?

“According to a report from TMZ, Suleman's rep Gina Rodriguez told a TMZ reporter that a bartender from the club T's Lounge was interviewed about Suleman's upcoming appearance and was less than kind about her personal life.”

While that is true, the person interviewed didn’t say anything that hasn’t been said about Suleman before. I wonder if this is truly the reason she decided to cancel the gig. Maybe she had second thoughts or maybe she got a better offer.

Regardless, I hope that Suleman has made the best decision for herself for her own reasons, not for something someone else thought or judged about her decisions.

This story raises the question yet again—what does our society believe is okay for a mother to do or be? And do we as mothers agree with how society defines our roles as mothers?

Can a Porn Star Be a Good Mom?

20/20’s theme Friday was “True Confessions,” which wouldn’t be complete without an adult entertainer of some sort.

ABC News introduces us to Natalie Oliveros, mom to 10-year-old Luchino, who is a porn star know as Savanna Samson.

"My life means nothing without, without him," Oliveros said. "Everything that I've done in my life, all the choices I've made, will one day benefit him instead of being a shameful thing for him."

We also have “Octomom” Nadya Suleman in the news this week saying that she might consider doing porn in order to provide for her children: Octomom Nadya Suleman Reevaluates Porn.

So the question everyone’s discussing: Can an adult entertainer be a good mother?

Well, let’s take a look at what really matters—is the mother providing for her family, raising her children to be good people, and being true to herself?

If a mother can say yes to all these questions, then I don’t see what the problem is. Being an adult entertainer is a legal job. Yes, it’s a job that requires a level of openness with one’s sexuality that not all people have, but if the woman is not harming others, why should it matter?

"I'm just an entertainer, and this is how I choose to entertain," Oliveros said. "And, morally speaking, that's what's confusing about me, is that I do have morals. And yet, it's contradictory, I guess, by the industry I'm in."

We all have different morals and those morals even change over time. But that’s just it—they are our morals, no one else’s to decide for us.

As adults, we all have “secrets” we don’t come right out and share with our children when they are too young to understand. And if we’re parents, we’ve all pretty much probably had sex at some point in our lives. Sex and children kind of go hand-in-hand.

So to jump to the conclusion that just because someone has sex for money on film that they can’t be a good parent just doesn’t add up. To attach our own “values” surrounding sexuality and what it should look like is unfair.

We all make choices and yes, there may be repercussions for adult entertainers in the form of more explaining that needs to be done for our children. But in the long run, sexuality is a complicated issue no matter whether we are or have been strippers or porn stars or are just moms who have more traditional careers.

Gypsy Rose Lee: A Burlesque Performer and a Mom

What a wonderful reminder by Amanda Crum that a woman can have it all.

In “Gypsy Rose Lee: Portrait Of A Burlesque Mom: Icon proved women can do it all” in WebProNews, Crum highlights Gypsy Rose Lee in a new and enlightening way.

Besides being a burlesque entertainer, Lee was a mother, even traveling with her son while she performed across the country.

“Burlesque performers are often still criticized and misconstrued for what they do, sadly, especially if they have children. Lee, who died of lung cancer in 1970, is a strong reminder to everyone that women can be free with their sexuality and still be witty, intelligent, wonderful mothers.”

What a needed reminder for us all today as former porn stars are being fired from teaching jobs because of their pasts.

Perhaps some critics may say that there is an overall difference between burlesque performers of yore and modern day porn stars and strippers, but I disagree.

As with anything, there is something to be said for not judging a book by its cover. To simply group all people of one occupation into one category is extremely short-sighted.

And for those who would say there is a wrong message being sent by a mother who has in the past (or even present) performed in some sexually-free way, I would simply question why adults cannot have separate lives outside their children.

If a parent is living their life with integrity and teaching by example what it is to be a good and loving person then why should it matter what they do or did for a living?

We are sexual beings; remember, that’s how we came to have children in the first place.

My Children Have More Troops

Happy Grilled Cheese Day!

I get so frustrated with myself when I lose my patience with my kids.

I remind myself that Cole is only three. Three. When I think about how short a time that is to be alive and to have soaked up the cultural mores of human beings I feel guilty.

He’s only trying to have fun and be with Mommy.

But, oh my goodness, when he just seems to have cotton balls in his ears and I have to repeat myself like twenty times, I want to run down the stairs, open the back door and run outside.

Then there’s Thomas screaming, I mean—SCREAMING—at the top of his lungs. 

And then Genny will turn and snap when I say no about something: Oh! Fine! What-EVER!

And I’m standing there asking myself, oh my goodness, why is this so tough? They are only three little children and I am one big, smart, strong adult.

And then there is my answer staring me in the face: they are a much larger army than I.