The Two Pounds

Just when I think I’m totally over caring what my body looks like, I’m proven wrong.

Yesterday was a big body issue day for me. It began innocently enough when I decided to go with a pants and a shirt instead of a dress for Nick’s cousin’s baby christening. Little did I know that when I tried to squeeze my fine self into the aforementioned black slacks my body would have nothing of it.

Nothing. Of. It.

Or any of my other nice black pants. My thighs strained at the seams. My tushie was pushing at the fabric’s strength. And the zippers were all definitely screaming, “Ha, ha. That’s a good one!”

It dawned on me that I would not be wearing pants. We were already running late because Genny decided for some reason to have a problem with every dress she owns. The flowered one had “a line on it,” the purple one, which fits perfectly, was “too big,” and so on and so forth with half-a-dozen other dresses.

She went on to have a major meltdown while Cole joined in on the action. He hadn’t even had his diaper changed yet, let alone have an outfit picked out that would fit him (if you will remember, Cole is having similar body issues).

Thank goodness Nick came to the rescue, scooping up Genny and helping her find the one dress that was satisfactory, and taking Cole and changing him. This gave me five minutes to run into the bathroom to shave my legs, since I was now going to wear a dress and could not hide my Mommy hairy legs beneath slacks.

The easy part taken care of, I then had to find a dress that fit. Fortunately for me, my soft jersey, yellow dress fit fine with no embarrassing bulges or straining.

So what happened to my cool? I’ve been fine with my slight weight gain so far. It isn’t even really a weight gain; I only weigh two pounds more than what I was before I was pregnant.

It’s the squishiness factor that creeps me out. I miss being more solid. More firm. More…”me,” or more the “me” I’ve always seen myself as.

Suffice it to say, I’m sure no one at the christening thought I looked any differently than I ever have. It’s all in my mind. Well, not ALL in my mind…there is the matter of those extra two pounds.