Wiggle It

I’m feeling better today.

I’m actually thinking my major depression feelings of the past few days have come from my hormones realigning themselves. I just started my period back after baby two months ago. The depression matches my ovulation timing perfectly.

I find it very peculiar to write about things like my children, my period, and stripper news all in the same blog post, but hey, here goes.

Have you all noticed how accepted strippers and strip clubs are lately? Well, I don’t mean “accepted” accepted, but there are often stripper news items to report. When I was a stripper in the early nineties, stripping was still very uncool and untalked about.

This afternoon Genny stood up on the kitchen chair and started shaking her tushie. It was a tushie dance.

She had watched The Wiggles beforehand and I was out of the room for some of it. Should I be worried? Are those Wiggles actually wiggling around in stripper stilettos?

Or was it those darn Care Bears?

Love Lost

I don’t know if you’ve noticed my blog posts have been a little depressed lately. I’m sorry for that. I’ve just been falling into one of my dumps lately. I’m feeling overwhelmed by life’s responsibilities. I’ve got three major projects I’m working on, too. Or I should say, trying to work on.

I guess I thought my daughter would love me.

I know she will one day. I mean, I know she loves me now, but she likes to make me think she doesn’t.

She lies. She constantly tells me she likes Daddy better.

When she was rude for the umpteenth time to me today I asked if she would speak to a friend like that.

“No, but I like my friends better than you.”

“OK, but that’s kind of rude to say. You should have some respect for your mother.”

“Well, I don’t. I respect my friends.”

“Do they take care of you? Will they buy you things and make you dinner?”

“No, but I like them better.”

I remember reading somewhere that it’s our jobs as parents to love our children, but not the child’s job to love us.

I believe this intellectually, but it hurts when I don’t feel love, or even like, from my five-year-old.

What Type of Girl is Your Favorite NFL Team?

What Type of Girl is Your Favorite NFL Team?
By Andy Benoit, www.NFLTouchdown.com

This choice article is a fine example of why sports bars and strip clubs belong together.

I keep thinking our society is evolving away from men like this and then I keep being proved wrong.

If NFL teams were girls, what type of girl would each one be? What would it be like to date that team/girl?: Let's find out.

Raiders

Ms. Raider is that super sexy, rough-around-the-edges girl with the notorious wild side. Her hair isn't its natural color, her cleavage appears to have been sculpted by Michelangelo and her lower back is stamped with a half-visible tattoo. The second you see her, you want her. But by the next second, you're smiling coyly and thinking, On second thought...looks like a blast, but probably too much for me. And you're right. Ms. Raider is a better stripper than girlfriend. She's always attracting large, surly alpha males (think Vin Diesel type). The ones who date her quickly learn to run because deep down, just like her mother, Ms. Raider is crazy as hell.

It's so endearing to see the woman-loving articles out there on the Internet.

Reporter Gets Hit by a Mean Hoe

The craziness continues. You must read this article and see the accompanying video of the fifteen-year-old stripper’s grandmother.

What really gets me though is the last line of the piece:

If you ask questions about a stripper, don't be surprised if you get hit by a hoe.

I’m sure a lot of men who frequent strip clubs are laughing heartily. But you know what? Why must strippers be so jeered upon? Why is it okay to make a joke like this? If they made this joke about anyone else, people would be in an uproar.

This just solidifies my feeling of absolute exhausted sadness tonight.

Mom finds teen daughter performing at topless bar

Rosemary Lumpkin says she got an anonymous call from someone claiming her 15-year-old daughter was a stripper at the business. So this spunky mom didn't waste any time -- she called Cocoa police and officers raided the place.

Why is this mother “spunky”? What mother wouldn’t call the police when they found out their fifteen-year-old was stripping?

The most disturbing thing about this article is the comments section. There are some really whacked-out responses to the fact that a fifteen-year-old girl was stripping. I’m wondering what planet these people are from.

Here’s a fine example:

More girls should start out this way as to get ready to spend their life serving their MAN as they should!

There is nothing like a well oiled machine, if you know what I mean?

Women were born to take care of MEN regardless of what happens to them....PERIOD!

For those of you who don't get it, GET OVER IT!

Oh, and I hope that this one was written as a joke, but…you never know.

I think it's a womans choice to dance on top of mens faces, laps, poles or wherever we want to dance! The dance is just a dance! We were born with our 'money makers' and we have the opshion of using them who ever way we want too. I gots lots of monies from doing this for meny years and are a verry eductated woman.
I terned out just fine and so will shie if only her mother aksepts her dancing. Dancing is an art form! We are artistses!
Not just hores!

Daddy Cyrus to the Rescue

Miley’s father has come to his daughter’s defense regarding the great stripper pole dance.

“I always tell her to love what you’re doing and stay focused for the love of the art and not worry so much about opinion,” he says.

I agree with what his beliefs in staying true to one's art.

I do think it’s important for a young girl to not glamorize being a stripper, too, but I stick to my guns in believing that Miley’s routine wasn’t meant to cause that connection.

And if people are so sure that’s what they see in that ice-cream cart pole and they are so upset and outraged by it, my real concern then becomes, what? The pole bothers you but the short shorts and the other innuendos don’t?

If we’re going to get all huffed up, shouldn’t we be more concerned by the overall message sent by sixteen-year-olds singing and dancing like this?

Shouldn’t we wonder what this tells us about the American youth culture?

What does this tell us about ourselves? About the importance we place on looks and sex and youth?

Isn’t Miley just providing the audience with what it wants and expects?

And aren’t we as adults in this society responsible for the culture we create?

Miley Cyrus: Stripper in Training?

I had to check out the video of Miley Cyrus on the MTV Teen Choice Awards after I read about how inappropriate her dancing was.

While I would agree that, yes, the dancers, including Miley, are all dressed in very short shorts and dancing pretty sexily, I just don’t see the stripper pole dance at all.

Yes, there’s a pole on top of the faux ice-cream cart that she holds onto while the cart is pushed stage left. Only once does she even dance while holding the pole.

Can a pole never just be a pole again?

Anyone who sees Miley as promoting stripping through holding onto a metal pole so as not to fall down probably has a stripper pole in their own bedroom. I don’t see how anyone without their minds fixated on stripper poles would ever make that connection.

Mobile Stripper pole on bicycle New York streets!!!

Now I’ve seen everything.

Thank you, Meredith, for this link.

From an online stripping thirteen-year-old to a stripper on a pedicab.

What is the world’s fascination with stripper poles all about?

Is Your Child an Online Stripper?

Online stripping? This letter details how a thirteen-year-old girl was earning $1 an hour in virtual money as an online stripper in Second Life.

I’ve never played these virtual games, so I know nothing about this issue.

It does seem strange that people would actually want to watch a virtual strip tease by a cartoon character.

I am not surprised by this letter though. Our children are online. They can see and learn about anything and everything.

Genny is five-years-old and already can operate a computer and play online games. She’s always supervised, but there will come a time when we will turn away for a few minutes.

How do we protect our children beyond education and supervision?

It’s a scary world. Our children will learn this sooner or later.

Oregon seamstresses sew custom-made strip-wear

There’s so much stripper stuff in the news that I’m trying to catch up on since I came home from vacation.

This article demonstrates that Portland, Oregon is the place to be if you’re a stripper: They harbor 50 strip clubs!

I remember a motherly figure that used to come backstage to strip clubs in Connecticut selling homemade costumes. I even bought a leopard-print tuxedo jacket with matching thong from her.

If you have good sewing skills, this stripper costume-making business could really prove to be lucrative.

...And I Wouldn't Have Thought "G-String" Was a Musical Term

Thank you to my friend Paul for this great conversation from Overheard in New York.

Oblivious teenage girl: Are strip cubs illegal?

Less oblivious friend: Um, no. Why would you think that?

Oblivious teenage girl: Cuz while I was going out with Matt he said something about a strip club getting busted.

Less oblivious friend: You went out with Matt? You slut!

Oblivious teenage girl: No, if I was a slut I would have known whether strip clubs are illegal or not.

--Central Park

Home Sweet Home

We’re back from vacation in Myrtle Beach, SC. We had a great time, but Nick was a bit stressed out since he was trying to work.

Cole liked the ocean. He is also now rolling over like nobody’s business, and he can crawl backwards.

Genny had a great time pestering all of her family members.

I even got one afternoon when Cole napped and everyone else was out at the movies or the alligator farm. Guess what I did? I got to read, uninterrupted for an hour! Now that’s a vacation!

Vacation

Stripper Mom and family are going on vacation for a week!

I probably won't be posting, so I'll see you all in a week.

Sleep, Baby

It’s so interesting how different ways of putting a baby to sleep are, well, so, different.

I’ve been trying an in-between take of the two extremes: let baby cry it out or respond to each cry from baby.

Nick and I have been trying to ease off the running to every single whimper. We’ve been having success with putting Cole to bed without nursing him into a coma. I’ve been nursing him and putting him in his crib while he’s still awake. He cries, but I don’t leave the room. I soothe him with songs and back rubs until he’s out. It takes about thirty minutes.

I figure this is a good step to helping him learn to fall asleep all by himself.

Today at Playland Village (an indoor play space in Monroe) I was speaking to another mother about Cole waking up four to five times a night. I told her I nurse him back to sleep each time.

“You’re going to have to let him cry it out,” she said.

“Well, I don’t know if I like that method. I don’t want to mess him up psychologically.”

“You won’t,” she said. “I’m a psychologist.”

So she explained it’s the way to teach Cole to go back to sleep in the middle of the night on his own: let him cry for a half-an-hour the first night, then an hour the next night.

“Turn off the monitor,” she said.

I just don’t know. Yes, I want to sleep for more than two hours, but I don’t want to make Cole cry.

What have all the mothers out there found to work?

Goodnight

Today was a bit overwhelming.

I’m exhausted.

Headache.

I need to sleep.

Here

This is where I want to be.

This is my mantra.

I sat beside Cole as he fell asleep in his crib dressed in his soft monkey onesie. He tossed and cried. He paused as I rubbed his back, his legs.

I held my hand against his lower back.

I wanted to be somewhere else. At my computer. Some me time.

This is where I want to be, I said.

I will be at my computer later. When Cole is asleep. Right now, this is important. Helping Cole learn to fall asleep. It takes patience. And I have that patience to give him, to teach him.

This is where I want to be. This is my job as a mother. To be here while he learns to sleep.

To be here. To give.

Nurse away

This is a new one—a breast-feeding doll.

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

I was surprised when I saw the title for this video on MSNBC. In fact, I was confused. Breast feeding? Like a baby doll and a mommy doll for it to nurse on? No: a baby doll to nurse on the little girl.

Sure enough, the video shows the commercial of a little girl putting on a halter top with flower pasties to nurse.

It seems odd to me, but Genny has never shown interest in nursing her dolls. Since she’s seen Cole nursing, the only reaction it’s spurred is that she wants to nurse again. But not seriously. She thinks it’s funny to pretend to want to latch on. I always stop her, but if I didn’t, would she actually nurse?

I wonder what her reaction would be to this doll. She reminds me all the time that she doesn’t want to be a mom. The reason? She saw me get a blood test while pregnant. I’ve explained that people get blood tests all the time for all kinds of things, not just being pregnant. And she’s already had blood tests. But still, she says, “I don’t want to be a mommy.”

Nick’s looking forward big-time to being a grandpa, so I hope she changes her mind.

I don’t know how I feel about the nursing doll. I mean, in principle, I don’t have a problem with it, but I do agree with the doctor being interviewed that it sexualizes young girls.

It would be better if the halter top didn’t have big flower pasties on it. Of course, then what? Pretend nipples? That would be weird.

I just don’t know. I guess being in a crappy mood today doesn’t help.

I’m feeling overwhelmed and unproductive.

If only I’d thought of the nursing doll, maybe then I’d be rich and sitting on a beach nursing my real child.

Giving Stripper Moms a bad name

Cops: Mom left 2 kids home alone to work at strip club

This woman is what people think of when they think of Stripper Moms.

When Fiordaliza Collado-Ramirez of Palm Bay, Florida couldn’t get a babysitter last night, she left her four- and five-year-old daughters home alone while she went to work. At a strip club.

The question I have is: was she planning on leaving them home alone all night by themselves? The report even says that the four-year-old was sick. How does a mother leave two small girls alone to go to a strip club?

After my initial anger and shock, another emotion and thought enters.

I wonder why she felt the need to not be late to her job. Perhaps she would have lost her job if she were late one more time. Perhaps she needed money to pay her rent or buy food. Perhaps this is the only job she feels she is any good at.

I am not forgiving her action by any means. I just want to remind us all that we don’t know the circumstances of her life.

I feel sad for her and her kids.

One more question: did the cops not let her change out of her work clothes?

Cold, please!

I’ve wanted the heat and now I’ve got it and I’m cranky as all get out.

I’m sick of being sticky and sweaty. I don’t know if it’s just me, but ever since I gave birth a second time, I feel sweatier and smellier. I can’t get clean.

I would like to live in a cold shower for the next month.

I would like icicles to hang from my nipples and a great ice floe to form around my midsection.

Ah…I feel cooler already.

This phase

Genny has a few annoying habits.

She laughs when she thinks someone has been hurt, but not in an embarrassed, don’t-know-what-to-do way. She purposefully laughs screechy and loud and then looks to see if she’s hurting that person’s feelings.

Genny also loves to tell me every chance she has that she likes Nick more than me. It’s fine that she says it, but she seems to do it to get a rise out of me. Nick says that I encourage it, but I don’t think so.

I wish my mother was here so that I could ask her if I said things like that to her. I don’t remember being mean to my mother at that early of an age. I was too shy and scared, I think.

I’m looking forward to Genny growing out of this phase.