Have a Stripperific Halloween!

Is-halloween-too-scary-or-too-sexy

Since when is Halloween the opportunity for kids to let out their inner stripper?


Perhaps we lived in a different era back when I was a kid in the 70’s. There were no “Halloween” stores for buying premade costumes. Either your mom sewed together a sad-looking bunny costume for you or you took a sheet and cut out a few eye holes.

A quick walk through the Halloween store at the Westfield Shopping Center in Milford with my three children was more like a let’s-get-the-hell-out-of-this-sex-shop rampage.

There were aisles and aisles of slutty this and slutty that. Fishnet stockings, stripper stilettos, and every Slutty McSlutty outfit you could imagine. And the short skirts and suggestive attire was not kept to just the adult costumes—no, even the Strawberry Shortcake outfit for a girl had a certain cheesecake appeal to it.

Thank god my kids were more freaked out by the over-the-top grotesque and scary outfits to notice all the slut fierceness surrounding them.

Cole softly murmured, “Let’s get out of here; let’s get out of here…” and I was more than happy to oblige.

Since when does everybody want to pretend to be a stripper on Halloween? And why?

Minka Kelly's Stripper Mom and Archie Comics

There are lots of recaps floating around the Internet this week about the actress Minka Kelly’s Las Vegas Stripper Mom.

The gist of her thoughts toward her “gorgeous” mother was that she wished she’d been more of a mom rather than a friend, but Kelly doesn’t seem to harbor any bad feelings about her mother having been an exotic dancer.

I’m hoping my daughter will be as easily forgiving. Of course, I’m not working as a stripper now, but as Genny is becoming more aware of the world around her, I know I will need to address the issue eventually.

She actually just discovered Archie comics a few weeks ago when I bought some at a tag sale. She’s already loving Betty and Veronica. I’m trying to remember what I made of all their boy-craziness when I began reading them as a girl. I think I was about her same age when I started.

Well, perhaps the Archies will be a good preview for her about how girls and boys can be silly sometimes. As far as I know, there aren’t any stripper moms in Archies though. Not so far at least.


Photo courtesy of Susie B of Freedigitalphotos.net.

Baby’s Growing Up

I’ve been so busy that I’ve barely had time for blogging. Genny and Cole’s school has phase-in this week, but next week they’ll be back on their regular schedule.

Tomorrow is baby’s first birthday.

I’ve really been struck lately, meaning the last few months, how many amazing things are going on with my children. I keep wanting to record all the little changes, but the days keep getting away from me before I can save these mementos.

Like Cole is now speaking not only in sentences, but paragraphs. His favorite words are: actually, nope, and zoombah, as in: “I love you Mommy, zoombah.”

Genny is convinced I don’t love her, but I do like her. If I gave her chocolate every Wednesday though, then that would mean I love her.

And Thomas climbed up the entire flight of stairs before we realized it. He can walk holding on to the living room table.

And me? I’m trying to do too much as usual. Teach for two colleges, get my manuscript ready for publication, work on my other three or seven major writing projects, plan out the possibility of starting a small press.

And, oh yeah—get used to the fact that no matter what I seem to do, my stomach just wants to poof out like a mushroom. And remind myself that I shoudn’t care about something like that anymore.

Gape Seed: A Poetry Anthology

I received my contributor copies of Gape Seed: A Poetry Anthology by Uphook Press.

My first book!

I have a poem titled "Leaving Me" included.

I'll let you know about upcoming readings.

If you'd like to purchase a signed copy, just let me know!

Excuse Me While I Have Sex, I Mean—Nurse My Baby…

It’s the old double-standard, or is it?



After I read about James Hazell, a BBC radio host, comparing breastfeeding in public to him having sex with his wife in a restaurant, I had to look into what his comments were. I felt outraged if what I heard was true, that women shouldn’t be allowed to breastfeed in public because, just like sex, it’s something that should be done in private.



After reading this article, I feel his comments may have been taken slightly out of context. While it is true that he doesn’t feel comfortable with public nursing, his comment about sex was in response to a woman saying breastfeeding was: “the most natural thing in the world.”



While I agree, Hazell’s comment makes sense in context: “Next time you are out having a meal at a restaurant, on the basis that it [breastfeeding] is the most natural thing in the world, I will come in there with my wife and then make love right in front of you. Breastfeeding is the most natural thing in the world, and that is fine, but there are a lot of natural things we don’t do in public.”



Yes, Mr. Hazell, I see your point. The “it’s natural” argument could open the door for people doing many socially-unaccepted things in public (masturbation, picking one’s nose, farting loudly, etc.), but when it comes to breastfeeding, it’s about nourishing a child; it’s not about satisfying some personal compulsion or something that could be put on hold until later.



When a child is hungry, he or she needs to eat. When one feels like having sex, one can (hopefully) wait until a room becomes available.

Stripping Down

I’m sorry I haven’t blogged here in awhile; I’ve been busy with my new blog Every Day Create.


I have great news though—my memoir Stripping Down is going to be published by Pink Fish Press.


I’ll give you more details soon!

A Stripper Mom at 48

Danielle Staub: Good-Bye ‘Real Housewives of New Jersey’, Hello Strip Club

Danielle, 48, has just signed a three-year contract with Scores Gentleman’s Club in NYC, TMZ reports, along with NSFW photos of Danielle on a stripper pole.

I’ve never seen the show The Real Housewives of New Jersey, but I’ve heard little flashes of it in the news.

I’m kind of impressed that Scores hired a 48-year-old mom as a stripper. Sure, they only did it for publicity sake, but still.

And I’m pretty amazed that Danielle Staub is confident enough to strip in Scores at 48-years-old.

I worked at Scores when it first opened. I was actually there on its opening day.

Scores is like the Cirque du Soleil of strip clubs—flashy, gimmicky, and full of people you kind of want to look at because they’re so beautiful and exotic, but kind of don’t want to look at because they’re so unreal-looking as to be a bit bizarre.

Perhaps Staub will fit right in.

Porn found in bin Laden hideout, officials say

I have to admit I find it humorous to imagine US officials studying the porn found in Bin Laden’s hideout for secret messages.

The U.S. has found so much pornography in the possession of al-Qaida operatives during previous raids that it spurred investigations into whether porn photos were being used to send coded messages, a former U.S. counterterrorism official told NBC News.

It is moments such as these when I stop and wonder who is in possession of naked photos of me.

Could naked photos of me be carrying secret messages across enemy lines?

Nah, probably just being used for “artistic” purposes!

Every Day Create!

I'm happy to launch my new website today: Every Day Create!

My life is so chaotic right now: 3 kids, teaching, writing.

I decided I need to create a goal to keep me centered every day.

I've had such good success this year with my commitment to work on my writing every day, so I figured, what if I applied that commitment to other areas?  Like my well-being! It’s just as important.

I believe we have the power to create our lives, but I have a hard time living into that.

One of my life challenges has always been not feeling like I’m allowed to fully live, really be myself—because I’m a bit worried people will see the real me, and well, not like me.

What if no one likes me? So what?!

I give myself permission to create my self out loud!

I devote myself to creating that self I’ve always wanted to be—bold, outrageous, joyful, and fun!

I’ll give myself (and you, if you so choose to accept the challenge) goals each week to create something totally new and unique. We won’t be staying in out comfort zone.

Join me.

Create your own daily goal every day, or use mine, or just watch what unfolds in the background until you’re ready to join in.

Every morning I’ll shoot my vlog, make my daily intention known to you—get it out of my head and into the world.

I’ll report back to you in the evening by blog to let you know how I did on following through.

Share your creation goals, too. Either vlog it or blog it in the comments section of my vlog.

Or you can just ditto if you’re going to try my goal of the day. The important thing is that you put it out there so you have someone else besides yourself counying on you.

Be sure to check back in later to let us all know your progress.

So that’s the general idea for now. I’ll tweak things as we go.

But I don’t want to wait to get started anymore.  I hold back on so many things because I always want things to be perfect.

No more!  Time to grab life and begin.

Let’s do it! Every day create!

Madonna is to Strippers like Sprinkles Are to Ice Cream

There's a short piece on Salon by Christine Macdonald today that really brought me back to the old days.

She's a former stripper turned writer and she talks about dancing to Madonna.

A part of me wants to shout out--What?!  YOU strippeed to Madonna, too?!  What a coincidence!  I did, too!

And her descriptions are so dead-on.  I danced to "Like a Prayer" also! 

I vogued on stage, too! 

And, I felt so cool and sexy doing it.  Madonna really brings out your inner-stripper.

But most importantly, Macdonald's writing reminds me that I was not and am not the exception.  There were and are a lot of other intelligent strippers (and ex-strippers, thank you very much) out there.

And you know what else?  There are good people still in the world...

I saw a lady driving by our house this week, pull over, get out of her car, pick up a leaf basket that was blown into the road, and carry it up into a lawn.  She paused, looked back at the road as if she were considering how windy it was, and then brought the basket further up into the lawn.

Then she got in her car and drove away. 

I actually said out loud as she drove away, "You've restored my faith in humanity."

Smart strippers and considerate drivers.  What a world!

Stripper Wisdom Graphic Memoir Excerpt

I have an excerpt from a graphic memoir I'm working on in Xenith Magazine.

Check out "My Other Nudie Jobs: Nude Housekeeper!"

Jet Fuel Review Spring Issue

I have a poem in Jet Fuel Review's premier issue.

Check it out here!

Prime Mincer

I have a graphic memoir piece published in Prime Mincer's debut issue.

I received my contributor copies--it's a very well-done literary journal.

If you'd like to purchase, please click through my Amazon button!

Mom, 3 children die when van goes into Hudson River

I know when I get overwhelmed with being a mother I sometimes feel like ending it all.  My depression can bubble up and rage through me.  I can feel like driving away and never coming back.

It can be a very scary feeling of being out of control.  Fortunately for me, I have a supportive husband and other support systems in place.  I know if I ever feel really crazed that there are people to turn to for help.

Unfortunately, for this mother, she was not able to find a way through her torment.

I don't know anything else besides what is in this article on MSNBC.  There was a domestic dispute.  Then she drove her car with her four children away, letting out the ten-year-old on the way to the river.  He then ran to the fire station and alerted them to what their mother was doing.

What makes this story hit me even harder is that her three children that died were all right about the same ages as my children.

To think of their final moments is to imagine my own three children in a situation like that.  I cry just imagining this.

I don't say this often, but my thoughts and prayers go out to this family, their friends, the whole town.  Our whole world.

No one should ever have to feel so hopeless. 

And before all the voices of, "Oh, what a horrible mother!  How could she?!" start exploding--I'd just like to ask that we stop and imagine how deeply disturbed this poor woman must have been to have been able to commit this act.

My heart goes out to them all.  May they rest in peace.

The Fertile Source

Check out my poems at The Fertile Source, a literary ezine devoted to fertility-related topics.

At the end of the poems there's a link to an interview with me by Tania Pryputniewicz.

Enjoy!

New Stripper Mom

Baby born outside Arlington strip club was first delivery for rescue crew

This is a delivery to remember.

Mom-to-be and Dad-to-be were zipping to a Texas hospital when they got pulled over for speeding. After the delay (and might I add, no police escort to the hospital) they got back on the road to head for the hospital.

Labor was progressing quickly and when they called 911, they were instructed to pull over into the nearest parking lot. That just so happened to be a Flashdancers strip club parking lot.
Hmm…there were NO other parking lots to choose from?

The father’s best coaching included this bit of wisdom:

“She kept saying, ‘The baby’s coming, the baby’s coming!’ And I was like, ‘No, it’s not, not unless you open your legs,’” Martinez said. “That was the line I kept getting teased about.”

Luckily, the paramedics arrived and delivered baby in the ambulance.

“Then we kind of breathed a big sigh of relief,” Wynn said, “and then I realized I had a lot of paperwork to do.”

My Other Nudie Jobs

Check out my graphic memoir piece called "My Other Nudie Jobs: Cocktail Waitress," at Foliate Oak Literary Journal.

I was having a lot of fun working on these graphic memoir pieces, but the dining room table where I was working has now become a changing table for the baby.

Just another way my children prevent me from being creative!

I'm getting the itch to start writing some more though; baby may just have to get chnaged on the floor.

Breast Milk Ice Cream

Nothing says yummy like breast milk ice cream.

According to The Examiner website there’s an ice cream shop serving up homemade ice cream infused with local women’s breast milk.

And what’s this flavor called? Why, Baby Gaga, of course.

I wonder if American ice cream parlors could get away with this. And would there be a market for it?

I suspect there are plenty who would line up for this icy treat.

Just as the customers slapped their five-dollar-bills down for a splash of breast milk in their drinks at The Hideaway strip club in Stamford twenty years ago. Yup, it was the old lactating-stripper-mother-squirts-milk-shots-into-your-glass trick.

That’s one thing I haven’t tried yet. Making money off my breast milk. I don’t think Thomas would approve.

Skating Lessons

Genny and I had a girls’ day on Sunday. I hoped a little alone time might help us bond a little.

It’s unbelievable how many issues came up for me as I skated in slow ellipses.

First of all, Wonderland of Ice is where I used to go when I was a girl, so I was hyperaware of everything that’s changed and even more of what hasn’t changed over the decades.

I could see myself in the preteen girls huddled and giggling, more concerned about how they looked on the ice than whether they were having fun or not.

The music made me want to boogie, which of course got my hips shaking and made me self-conscious of my movements. Do I ice dance like a stripper?

I tried to keep my body from moving so as not to embarrass my daughter, but I think I did myself a disservice—as I often do in the name of public decency.

Why am I always so concerned about what others think of me? It’s not like I wanted to gyrate my hips, I just wanted to glide and shake. I’m afraid I’m bottling my sense of self because of worries of what others will think of me.

Genny was having a marvelous time as all these thoughts raced through my mind. Of course, she was doing ice-shuffling and I was unable to ever leave her side, so I really didn’t have the opportunity to let my body open up on the ice.

But I also thought of how much I do love to perform. Although I’ve never taken ice skating lessons, I have a sense of wanting to imitate the moves. I feel that I would be good with a few lessons.

I don’t want to do triple axles or anything, but I’d love to be able to turn a little, spin, glide, embellish with my arms.

And then here comes my inner critic again.

You’re too old. You’d embarrass yourself. Why start something new now? Who has the time? Why bother doing something if your aim is not to be the best?

I would love to have a hobby. My life just doesn’t afford me the time.

If I could, I’d love to take ice skating lessons. And I’d love to wear a cute little skating outfit with a skirt. I’d twirl and beam. Not for anyone else (honestly, I wouldn’t want anyone else to watch), but for the joy of dressing up, playing, and gliding to the rhythm my body so desperately wants to join.

Religion focus of custody fight involving former exotic dancer turned devout Jew

Now there’s a headline I never thought I’d see: Religion focus of custody fight involving former exotic dancer turned devout Jew.
But as I read the article what I find most interesting is that there’s a question about this woman’s ability to raise her son since she was an exotic dancer, but there’s no issue about the father having been a strip club manager.

“The question here is who is the better decision-maker,” the father’s attorney, Joel Brodsky, said in his brief opening statements before Cook County Circuit Court Judge John Thomas Carr Wednesday. Brodsky said before the hearing that he intends to bring up Margolina’s days as an exotic dancer — and her subsequent conversion to devout Judaism — to show the court that she “tends toward extremes.”

Now if that isn’t a double standard, I don’t know what is.